H₂O NAGARIYA

Ghost in ipl match :: best comedy story

“Duniya men jin bhi logo ne bade bade kaam kiye hai wo kya nahane ke baad kiye the”, gupta ji ne gusse mein apni patni se kaha. “Haan , apne bhi koi bada kaam nahi kiya hai abhi tak”, gupta ji ke patni ne jawab diya. “Aree tumse shaadi karna koi chhota kaam tha”, gupta ji ne fir kaha. “Haan meine bhi to kiya hai tumse shaadi, chhota kaam to meine bhi nahi kiya fir”, ye baat gupta ji ki patni ne kahi. “Aree kam se kam Sunday ko to chain diya karo”, gupta ji ne chid ke kaha. Par unki patni ne iss baat par koi jawab nahi diya. Shaadi ke kai saal baad ka har shardi thik thak bit thi, lekin in shardiyon mein gupta ji ko na jane kya ho gaya tha ki unhone nahana ek dam naa ke barabar kar diya tha. Ji haan nahana , naa ke barabar. Mrs Gupta ka naa ke barabar nahana ka matlab ye tha ki guptaji akhir baar pichhle ravi baar ko nahaye the, aur iss ravi baar ko nahane kaa anakani kar rahe the. Jab unki patni iss ki wajah unse puchhi to unhone sari jimmedari iss nirdayi nisthur nirlaj nrusans aur nikammi shardi par daal di.

Akhbaar ko apni patni ki aur badhate hue guptaji ne kaha, “dekhiye kya likha hai isme, pure uttar bharat mein seet lahar chal rahi hai, pahado mein baraf gir rahi hai, charo taraf dhund hai, cricket se jyada shardi ke record tut rahe hai. Aisi shardi mein koun naha sakta hai. He..” saare ankde gupta ji ke patni ko bichalit na kar sake, “mein kounsa apko thande pani mein nahane ko keh raha hu, bathroom mein gizzer lagaya hai.” “baat gizzer ki nahi , mujho to balti pe rakhe kisi bhi tarah ke paani se dar sa lagta hai.”, gupta ji ne jawab diya. “Ghin nahi ati hai apko apne aap se, ek ek hapte tak na nahana, are puri diniya ki log yahi karte hai kya!, mein nahi nahati, bachhe bhi to roj nahate hai, ap ke dapter mein to log roj nahate honge.” “mahan byakti sada alag rah pe hi chale hai.” Ye keh ke guptaji ne mahanataa ki pataa fek diya. Guptaji yahi nahi ruke, aage kehne lage, “aur wese bhi ye badi badi companiya deodorant kiss liye banaya hai? Mujh jese karodo logo ke liye to banaya hai. Kapde to mein roj badal hi leta hu. Fir kya do lota paani girane se kya ho jayega. Mat bhulo sher kabhi nahata nahi hai, issi liye raja kehlata hai.” “to raja sahab chidiya ghar mein jake raho na jake, sher ke saath” , rasoi mein se gupta ji patni ne kaha. Gupta ji ko ajib laga kyun ki patni ne unko chidiya ghar mein sher ke saath rehne ko kaha. Chidiya ghar ki jagah wo jungle bhi keh sakti thi kyun ki sher kabhi nahata kahani mein ullekh kiya gaya sher jungle mein hi rehta hai, aur wahi wala sher raja hota hai. Are chidiya ghar wala sher to praja ki sreni mein aata hai. Aur wo nahaye na nahaye kisko kya karna hai.

Agle din bhi gupta ji bina nahaye daptar chale gaye.. mehenge deodorant bhi apna jaadu dikha rahe the. Gupta ji dekh ke koi nahi keh sakta ki ek byakti nahane ke paani se dur rehta hai. Office mein bhi wo apne aapko manobaigyanik jit dilane ke liye sahkarmiyo se din bhar shardiyo ki baat jar rahe the. Jaise aaj ka taapmaan kya hai, kal ka taapmaan kya ho sakta hai, simla aur unke seher mein taapmaan kitna fark hai. Kabhi kabhi ustah mein guptaji ye baat bhi keh dete the ki , “ ab ye din dur nahi jab maidani ilake aur unki seher mein bhi baraf giregi.”dusri taraf gupta ji ki patni apne pati ki iss buri adat se paresaan ho gayi thi. Unko lagta tha ki na nahane se ghar mein daridrata garibi aa jati hai. Iske alawa na nahana syast ke liye bhi kharap hota hai. Subha se yahi sochte sochte dopeher ho gayi thi. Do peher mein unki saheliaur padosan sila didi ghar pe ayi, “ kya hua paresaan lag rahi ho”, sila didi ne kuch der baate karne e baad puchha. “ kuchh nahi didi bas inki wajah se thoda paresaan hu.” Are jhagde kis ghar mein nahi hote, paresaan mat ho”. “ didi jhagda nahi hua, inko gandi aadat lag gayi hai. Inhone nahana chhad diya hai. Kehete hai shardi mein nahaya nahi jata.” “nahana chhod diya kya matlab?” haan didi ek hapte se nahi nahaye, agar nahane ki baat karo idhar udhar ki baate suru kar dete hai, dharmik ban jate hai. Kal keh rahe the ‘tan ko dhone ka kya fayeda jab man hi na dhoya’ meine kaha ek din chhod ke nahalo, kehte hain ek ek din chhodke dino ke saath na insafi kyun karni. Ya to raj nahao ya fir aise hi rehne do. Bahut samjhaya lekin samajhte nahi hai. Aap bhi batayiye didi aise koi achha lagta hai kya. Mujhko to ghar hospital jese lagne laga hai.”

Sila didi sab kuch bade dhyan se sun rahe the. Sab sunke wo boli,(fusfusake) “dekh iss mamle mein teri madad kar sakti hu, lekin tujhe ye wada karna hoga ki tu ye baat kisiko nahi batayegi.”. aisa kya bataogi’”, mrs gupta ne herani se puchha. “ dekh jo dikkat tere pati ko hai na wahi dikkat pichle saal shardi ko mere pati ko bhi thi. Mahina mahina bhar nahi nahaya karte the. Meine unko do din ke liye unhe waha bheja bas tabse sardiyo mein bhi nahate hai wo bhi thande pani se.” . “ kaha bheja pane didi?”, mrs gupta ne puchha. Pehle jal debta ki kasam kha ki kisiko nahi batayegi.” “Haan sila didi kasam se kisiko nahi bataungi”. “ apne pati ko do din ke liye bhej de H₂O nagariya” sila didi ne kaha. “ h2o nagariya, wo kahan hai didi?”. “Koi nahi janta kaha hai, iss diniya mein ya uss duniya mein ya fir kisi aur hi dunniya mein , lekin iss nagariya mein unn sabka illaj hota hai jo nahane se katrate hai. Bas itna samajh lo ki na nahane walo ka dhulai center hai ye h2o nagariya.